2 min read
As we get older there are traits we tend to latch onto. It is human nature to find comfort in what we are used to. We are creatures of habit. But never forget, it doesn’t matter how old we are there is always room to grow and become a better version of ourselves.
Take a look at the 5 categories below and see if you carry any of these habits. And if you do that’s okay! These are common traits that many of us hold, but once you acknowledge these traits and try to shift your mindset you will start to see a dramatic improvement in your life!
- Fearing Change
We fear change because we can’t anticipate the outcome. Many of us try to live calculated lives, but this isn’t always the best option.
When we shift our mindset in a new direction we are forcing our habitual nature to shift direction. This stimulates new neural activity and it allows us to learn new things. New practices, new ways of thinking, new perspectives. The world is complex and the more we allow ourselves to be openminded the more we can understand and appreciate in life.
If you want to overcome this habit you need to make it a practice to change your thought process. You are not just a character you are in control of your life and your thoughts.
You are driving home from an interview and you find your mind is wandering into another world…
You start thinking over everything that was said. You begin to ask yourself so many questions! What if I told them too much about myself? Did I talk too much? Did I not talk enough? How was my handshake? Oh no! I think my hands were sweaty! That can’t be good! Now they won’t want to hire me! Oh no! What did I do??
Do you see how that escalated? We start thinking about things that may not even matter. If they liked you in the interview why would they not want to hire you because you have sweaty hands?? This is what we call anxiety, stress, and it isn’t healthy!
Why worry when there is no need for it? What is done is done and there is no need to overthink it!
How do you shift away from this thought process? First, you acknowledge it and then you forgive yourself for falling into this trap. Find time for yourself, relax so that you can empty your mind, and always remember there is no such thing as perfection!
- Living in the Past
As we grow and experience new things our minds grow and adapt. Our thought process will shift. As an adult, you would not do the same things you did as a child right? In many cases, we tend to look back at past experiences and we tend to hold grudges towards ourselves. We know it is important to forgive others, but it is just as important to forgive yourself.
When you live in the past it robs you from the opportunity to live in the present and there is a lot you could be missing out on!
If you can’t change it you shouldn’t dwell on it. You have grown, matured and you have learned from past experiences. I am sure you would do things differently today so why dwell on it?
Be proud of your accomplishments of learning from your experiences and proceeding in life in a way that will benefit your future.
- Negative Self-Talk
Studies have linked negative self-talk to higher levels of stress and lower levels of self-esteem. This can impact your level of happiness and decrease your motivation. Which in time can lead to depression, broken relationships, and it can drastically impact your life.
Know that you are worthy of anything anyone else has. Make it a habit to say great things about yourself! You are smart, beautiful, happy… Make this a practice first thing in the morning in order to set your day on the right path. You can even stick notes on the bathroom mirror with positive messages so that you see it first thing in the morning.
You are amazing! And you should always remember that and never let yourself or others tell you otherwise!
- Trying to Please Everyone
You are an amazing person and all you want to do is make others happy. When they ask for help you will give them your “arm and leg” so that you can make them happy. That is fine, I think it is amazing to help others! But never give people so much that it jeopardizes your wellbeing. The last thing you want is to feel stressed or anxious because you put yourself last.
Always make time for yourself first and don’t feel guilty! EVER! Because if you can’t take care of your wellbeing it will be difficult to be there for others!
If you are helping those that don’t deserve your help you will experience disappointment after disappointment and it can feel devastating. It can drastically bring down your spirit and that is the exact opposite of what you are trying to accomplish.
It might be hard but it is okay to say NO sometimes!
Your mind is powerful and it is SO important to make it a practice to manage your thoughts. You will notice I used the word “practice” a lot. That is the key. Self-discipline, guiding, and consistently managing your thoughts. By doing this you will take the best step you can in living a fulfilled and happier life!